Gotta Love These Invitations!

A few minutes ago, the Egg Donor came in talk to me. She invited me not to ride with her and Matt up to Portland, because there's no room for me. She said that, with transporting all the birds, there was just no room for me, Smidgen, Toby, and our stuff.  So I guess I'll be paying a shit ton more money to fly out of San Diego on the 8th of May, instead of Portland a little later in the month.  I told her that was fine, I expected it, that I knew my place, and had known it for quite some time.

"It's one of the main reasons my depression got so out of control," I said to her.  "But that's fine.  I've made my peace with my lack of importance, so I guess that's it."

She just sat there, looking at the floor.  I then asked, "Is there anything else?"  

"No, I guess not," she said, getting up and leaving my room, closing the door behind her.  Apparently, she isn't happy with what I had to say and the frankness with which I said it.  Too bad.  I'm not going to sugar coat my words to ease any discomfort on her part.  Why should I?  She certainly hasn't sugarcoated anything she's said to me in regard to the move and just how unwelcome I truly am.  Oh, well.  They can take their nasty birds and drive off into the sunset, happy as clams.  I don't need them. 

As for me, I'll be just fine, one way or another.  And I'll be so much better in some areas, like being away from the constant reminder that my birth was a huge, huge mistake.  Just being free of Matt's endless unpleasantries is enough to plaster a wide Joker-like grin on my face.  If Aunt Tudi is able to witness how things have gone with the Egg Donor and me over the past four years, I wonder what she thinks of how the Egg Donor fulfilled her promise that she'd help me and be there for me after Aunt Tudi passed, considering some of my health issues, like the seizures.  Maybe if I were the size I was in the accompanying picture, there'd be enough room for me.  Then again, I wasn't much larger than this when she abandoned me the first time, so what-the-fuck-ever.  I'm over it.

  • Current Location: the house
  • Current Mood: numb numb
  • Current Music: Shriekback - Hymn to the Local Gods
Each time I read an update about her, I always think she can't become anymore disgusting. And then she proves me wrong.

Good for you for being direct with her, and not making it easy or comfortable for her to be such a horrible person.

I know this makes it much harder on you and your fur kids, but I think not being stuffed in a car with them is actually a huge check mark on the plus side.

If/when you set up a funding thing, make sure to link it. I make crap wages as a nanny but I will try and toss at least a small bit your way.
Hopefully, I won't have to set up a GoFundMe account, but thank you so much for wanting to help. Like I told Heidi just a few minutes ago, I don't know what I would do without my Tribe, my Ka-tet. YOU are the family I would not otherwise have, and I love all of you so much.